No.204
If a guy starts bringing up who pays for the date and how women should pay for dates and not just the men (especially if he has his own money) then just leave, if a guy is genuinely interested in you and likes you then this topic will never be opened up in the first place.
No.209
>>206i agree with this. and i also want to say that you should never argue on the internet unless you're aiming to have fun.
No.210
>>206>>209Professional troll here, I agree as well and here's some of the tactics I use so you gyns can ignore them as much as possible.
>poke fun at your most valid points >poke fun at any rage or frustration you'd show >the less you say the more I'd go "weak reply" or any other taunt to encourage you to embarrass yourself more And remember, once you stop replying and they "win" it's all in their head and the only true winner here is you for jot replying and wasting your time and brain cells. But please do use my tips here on moids, they're stupid enough to not notice.
No.805
For the longest time I didn't know that myreadingmanga had a bookmark feature, you just need to create an account and then bookmark away as much as you like!
No.806
>>210In all honesty this just makes you look incredibly pathetic for wasting your time arguing with internet randos even if it's done """ironically""". Actually even more so since you're not even trying to prove a point, a more entertaining way to troll would be to just bullshit people and watch their reactions.
No.820
>>210>Professional trollwho do you work for, how much do they pay, how do i get this job?
No.832
Do not reply to retarded teen antis on twitter.
Do not show how you are affected by teen antis on twitter.
Do not react to them at all.
They only do it for attention and celebrate if you show them any type of acknowledgement.
"It's been going on for months" tough shit there have been creators putting up with shit for years and they still bounce back. They more you ignore these weirdos, the less of them there will be and they will move onto the next thing to get mad at.
Also gatekeeping your hobbies is good, actually. Gatekeep hard, it works. I've seen people legitimately say they've dropped fandoms and anime and whatever else they're into just because of people on the internet who they'll never meet in real life. I think it's pathetic to stop loving something you love just because of a stranger's actions but it's nice to know it can be used to your advantage.
No.833
>>832>Also gatekeeping your hobbies is good, actually. Gatekeep hard, it works. I've seen people legitimately say they've dropped fandoms and anime and whatever else they're into just because of people on the internet who they'll never meet in real life. I think it's pathetic to stop loving something you love just because of a stranger's actions but it's nice to know it can be used to your advantage.This is why I say tell people we need gatekeeping! I gatekeep all the time but I try to very subtly. Works like a charm
No.835
>>833Based. People are too afraid of being mean these days so that's probably why it's not done more often. We need gatekeeping more than ever and I hope more people will see the benefits of keeping a hobby to it's niche audience. You can still get new fans of something, just drive out the people who are fake fans
No.918
>>835>>833I saw that in the furry fandom there was another con recently where people were being public nuisances by leaving filled diapers and vomit lying around in public and showing off excessive PDA. Pretty much another Rainfurrest, if you've seen that one internet historian video.
That made me think back to these posts about how there's benefits to gatekeeping, cause from what I've seen the furry fandom has had the opposite mindset for years where every socially inept dipshit is coddled and accepted even in public spaces where they can cause trouble for normal people.
No.944
>>918There was a con where that happened that WASN'T Rainfurrest? Jeezas Crust I'm actually starting to feel sorry for furries but they also bought that upon themselves so not really kek. Also I hate furries for being hypocrites calling shotacon "pedophilia" while they jack it to dog dicks so they get what they deserve.
Always gatekeep, it is morally correct.
No.1037
>>961Oh my god I feel bad for whoever had to type all those nice words, I would have let loose and cursed these furries out.
No.1074
>>1070While you're right about these crazies not deserving the attention they're given and that they short circuit if you don't give them the power, it's too easy to say "lol just don't care!" when you're not the one being mobbed. These kids rarely attack complete randos and instead target people with a following (how else would they find you?) so you have more things at stake than just psychos @ing you for two days. They dig up your old tweets from 8 years ago of you dropping questionable takes, doxx you and look up your employer, harass everyone following you to unfollow, take your posts out of context and in worst cases someone you used to associate with jumps abroad for clout and starts leaking your DM logs to air out your dirty laundry. And it can happen to anyone over any innocuous mistake or supporting the wrong ship.
Even if people give you support support and fight the fight for you, the "Hey wasn't anon that racist KKK member who liked kiddy porn and groomed minors online?" rumor is a cat that's nearly impossible to put back in the bag once it's out. That's why people fight tooth and nail to at least clear their name somewhat since for a lot of people silence means compliance.
No.1075
>>1070my go-to reply to these accusations, is the fact that 95% of actual gay men don't care about this discussion
No.1076
>>1074Bold of you to assume I haven't been mobbed or seen people that got mobbed just like this. End the end, ignoring retards is still the best thing you can do. Once you do literally anything, even "clearing your name", you are still acknowledging those obsessed schizos and the people who might so much as glance at your twitlonger apology will still not forgive you because they're just as obsessed with drama. Giving dramawhores any kind of attention or bending the knee to them is shouting that they can control you and gives them incentive to do it again. Yeah if your life is threatened or you're doxxed obviously you should contact the authorities but showing off about it in a thread on twitter will not make them stop.
You can always bounce back from any type of drama. See the abbystea drama for example (tl;dr, said some transphobic shit i think, anti-fujo shit, probably homophobic shit too, but didn't see a decrease in patre0n support or twitter engagement. She moved on and still does the art she wants to do and even some popular notable fujo artists still follow her).
No.1078
>>1076>You can always bounce back from any type of drama. See the abbystea dramaFeels like you can only bounce out of drama if you're a meaningful creator like an artist instead of just a regular person though.
No.1080
>>1076Abbystea was defended by an army of pedoscrotes who love their based oneeshota coomer goddess, most fujo artists remain completely alone and become social pariahs once they're cancelled. I'm not saying that you should buckle under pressure and post grovelling twitlonger messages explaining your entire mental health and sexual history just because you drew anime boys kissing but it's still understandable why so many people resort to that in their desperation and feel like they're losing everything when everyone supports you in the DMs but never speaks out in public.
No.1081
>>1078This, smaller creators without a horde of scrotes to back them up usually can't bounce back as easily. It's a cop out, but it honestly is easier to just put she/they or they/them pronouns in your intro if you don't have the energy/spite to fight back against the anti-fujo zoomers.
No.1082
>>1080>pedoscrotes for liking oneeshotaI don't like oneeshota but if you think cartoons are "pedo" then you're on the wrong site. Go back to twitter or tumblr, bitch
No.1083
>>1082Seethe. The "muh cartoons" defence doesn't work for creepy, misogynistic men that account for 99% of child sexual abuse cases. Scrotes don't have the ability to differentiate fiction and real life.
No.1084
>>1083>Anime porn is comparable to real abuse excuseOh I've seen this one before. Just tell us how many gigs of cheese pizza you have on your hard drive now and save us the trouble, pedo
No.1089
The fuck is going on here? I just want advice on how to grow a spine in the face of "ew, ur toxic" and not run away from fandoms.
No.1090
>>1089Just block and ignore the retards, what other advice do you want to know?
No.1091
>>1089Be based and keep posting regardless of what anyone thinks.
No.1092
>>1089I agree with
>>1090 and
>>1091So just do as you want and don't give them any attention, that's how most Chinese artists I know grow an even larger following regardless of the harassment they get from western accounts
No.1093
Why is it that theres this political shift where everything has to strictly be politically correct even in spaces like yaoi? I do no understand why it is even happening in the first place.
No.1094
>>1093I absolutely hate it! I don't think anyone wants to read a yaoi that preaches to you same as how western comics are doing recently.
No.1115
>>1089I wish I had the confidence to talk about things I like without feeling like I'm doing something wrong because I'm not sharing the same fandom thoughts everyone else seems to do so I'm on the same boat.
No.1194
>>1094Nothing's quite as slimy and repulsive as a self-righteous preachy sex scene/comic.
No.1202
>>805bless your heart nonita
No.1373
>>1093same. it shouldve just stayed about men clapping eachothers cheeks
No.1942
>>1082Four months later and NTA but kill yourself you fucking piece of shit of a scrote. You jack off to fictional boys and then come to a fujo board to defend your degenerate mentally ill crap instead of going outside, earning money and having normal relationships, literally hang yourself you sorry excuse of human waste, there is NOTHING you are contributing to society. Men like you are the modern fucking plague and if all of you suddenly dropped dead one day we'd fucking have a toast.
No.2243
>>2241I just store it in a folder and my phone isn't locked so literally anyone could stumble upon it. Maybe i'm not the norm lol. But I do sort of relate to the whole "what if the governement thinks i own yaoi and thinks it's illegal or something" thoughts, especially when I browse yaoi on the internet. Remember that the governement have no need to spend their energy on some random person looking at 2D men buttsecks. At least I assume so, since there's far worse people out there on the internet.
For storing porn tho, you can switch to a different app if this might help you feel safer. There's ways to create "locked" folders so that only you can access them. And for the algorythms that might "push yaoi porn"' onto you, just know the worse I personally got (and i save lots of 2d men buttseks pics) was just some youtube add for webtoon which was for some yumejoshi type stuff. Hope that might alieviate the worry.
No.2244
>>2241I straight up move it all to a folder with a blank thumbnail preview for the album, then hide it if people want to borrow my phone (I have too many normie albums anyway to the point they all get lost within each other and I could probably just hand it over without worrying), and all my bookmarks are incognito. My phone is locked at all times anyway for various reasons.
No.2245
>>2241You're definitely paranoid, the government has no time to waste on someone jacking off to 2D men, and big tech companies know your interests regardless of what you decide to save. If you use Chrome, they literally log every single click you make while in-browser. I have 15k+ images on my computer and don't get coomer or BL ads, but I use a lot of privacy-based programs and browsers so that might help.
One thing I would do though is put a sticker or piece of tape over your webcam, unless you need to be in conference calls there is literally no reason to have that uncovered. I've only known on person who has had that hacked, but again, literally no reason to give them that opportunity.
No.2252
>>2241I have it all on display, there is nothing hidden. If they're going to browse through my shit then it's their problem if they stumble onto my collection of gay porn.
No.2255
>>2241I don't hide it. I used to worry about what Google or whatever had about me but because there's an overwhelming amount of people out there who read/look at gay cartoon porn I don't really care anymore. It's like being worried Google knows my grocery list. Milk, eggs, yaoi–completely innocuous.
>>2252Based. I like to think of it as showing snoopers what it's like to have good taste.
No.2256
>>2255>>2252>>2245>>2243>>2244Thanks for the reassurance, nonnas<3 I feel more safe having yaoi porn saved on my phone now knowing that other people have it too.
>But I do sort of relate to the whole "what if the governement thinks i own yaoi and thinks it's illegal or something" thoughtsyea I do tend to overthink alot and think everything I do can get me in trouble even when I know what I'm doing is harmless, my thought process is similar as picrel.
> I use a lot of privacy-based programs and browsersI use the duckduckgo app and burn my history pretty frequently. And I use a non-Google email that doesn't have my real name attached to KT for browsing Pixiv and Twitter.
No.3134
>>3133I've used jpn-depot and it was fine. Failing that you could pick something off the proxy and forwarding services list on buyfags.moe
No.3155
>>3154are you people literally me? i have irl fujo friends but they're both straight
No.3156
>>3155Having a fujo gf is my dream but I'd kill for irl fujo friends too. Closest I've had to one was in 8th grade, but we haven't talked in years. How'd you manage to find your people, nonna?
No.3157
>>3156met both of them in high school, knew the first one was into shipping since we started off talking about anime and vocaloid and just went further from there, knew the second one was also into shipping based on her fanart and what she told us
the actual group fujo discussion only ever really came to a full boil in 2021 when all 3 of us were arguing over if a character should top or bottom, but the real pillars of finding people are spending time and the willingness to just be cringe and genuine. Then it sort of snowballs from there, especially if you introduce your friend groups to each other
No.3348
>>3154>>3155>>3156I got desperate and made a tinder
I put my body pillows as the profile pic (they're fully clothed) and made my description "I want to kiss another fujoshi on the mouth"
I was banned right after
I'm going to die a virgin
>>3157The next time I go to a con I'm gonna make a better effort to speak to others!! It's hard but I gotta try!!! Irl fujo friends are the best
No.3359
>>3348good luck anon, i wish you the best! here's to more fujo friends in the new year
No.3366
>>3359Thank you!! I just gotta believe…
Let's all make lots of fujo friends in the new year and maybe also get laid
If anyone has any tips for finding other fujos on dating apps (is fujoshi a banned word?? Tinder why?) Lmk cuz I'm gonna try again…!
No.3501
I've developed some anxiety over the years. I decided I'm going to get a roomate or even a bf/husband in the future, to help manage my anxiety easier.
But how the fuck do I handle my fujo actvities? I'm not really a coomer, at most I oogle at 2d men and move on. Do I really need to hide my power level for the rest of my life?
I see doujin artists getting married and continuing to make BL of their favorite characters.
No.3502
>>3501If it's a roommate, ideally another fujo.
But regardless of who it is, you don't spend 100% of your time breathing down each other's necks. I wouldn't want to be around someone who forced me to give up my hobbies, and you can just do them in your private time. Every healthy relationship makes time to be alone.
No.3505
>>3501Don't give up on your hobbies and don't give up on relationships if you want to be in one but I don't think another person is gonna help for anxiety long-term. It's unfortunately one of those things that only you can do for yourself.
No.3533
>>3501Plenty of people don't care, especially straight men since their fetishes can be just as weird. My husband and almost all of my friends know I like BL. If they ever give me shit I make fun of the things they like. Good luck on the hunt though, nonna!
No.3545
>>3501My bf of 4 years doesn't know I'm a fujo. Honestly I hope I never have to tell him.
No.3611
>>3607This sounds like hell. Are they online or offline friends?
No.3612
>>3607friends with ironic humor who think you're just half-joking about being a fujo, having to hide your weirder interests so they don't shun or gossip about you, the desire to just cut them out of your life, not even having many friends in the first place… anon holy mother of god we have the exact same struggles
i simply just left the group chat my aforementioned friends are in, and it's been a breath of fresh air. not cutting contact with them completely, but not talking to them nearly as much as i used to… it's a nice feeling. i'd suggest doing something similar to that if you're able to
i want to talk about super specific 2d boys being violently raped too, but i don't really have anybody for that. nobody but my diary, at least. sperging on this site is really nice to do, though. most nonnies here
get it, y'know? so go crazy, i'll be cheering you on
No.3614
>>3611embarrassed to say that it's online… i'm not much of a people person because i unironically hate everyone around me. humans suck. love my cat.
>>3612heheh, that's really comforting. i'll remain spineless for a while yet. i wanna focus on other things while i make a decision, but until then, i guess you're right, i do have fellow fujos here to sperg out with.
No.3615
>>3614No embarrassment about online friends (nearly all of my friends live in my computer), just wanted to know because online friends are much easier to drop.
I feel like you should be yourself around them more and see what happens. Some of them might even be waiting for somebody else to first fly the freak flag. I say embarrassing shit that boarders on oversharing in mixed company all the time because I WANT to know how people react to it for filtering purposes.
No.5126
How to Bitcoin?
No.5138
I've been a fujo for years, but what's the best way to heavily participate in fandom? I'm obsessed with something nobody in the west knows or cares about.
No.5139
>>5138Find out where the fandom hangs out, if it's japanese, it's probably twitter.
No.5140
>>5138Fwiw, you can try to shill it here just to see if other people might be interested in it.
No.5141
>>5140I would love to, but it's so specific it would be avatarfagging if you saw me elsewhere online
No.5142
>>5141Is the internet really that small?
I'd figure any series with any sort of online presence has at least two western fans running around somewhere.
No.5143
>>5141I'm into something like this. It's so funny when you meet other fandomish people but just can't get into the REAL specifics of what you like because it would essentially be doxxing yourself. Just seems too personal to put on a -chan!
No.5145
>>5143That's exactly it. Fuck it, I'm making fanfics and fanart to help spread the word, even if I only interact with Japanese fans on Twitter
No.5213
I'm afraid that I can't enjoy fandom like I used to because I've developed severe anxiety surrounding being online. It's legit become hard for me to sleep at night because I'm so paranoid. I really want to make friends with people that have similar interests, but I don't know how to get over my fears and struggle to talk to them. What do I do
No.5215
>>5213What parts of it make you anxious? Personally would suggest mainly stucking to anonymous places like here if its the idea of being tied to an identy that will be used against you later.
Do you maibly participate via drawing or writing? Ao3 has a lot of cobtrol over locking your works to avoid harassment (turning off commments and such). Id look into the settings you use.
No.5224
>>5215I'm afraid that someone's going to tie my personal identity to my online one. I try to keep them separate now but I was pretty lax about privacy in the past. I also posted a ton of stupid shit as a kid that I don't want to be dug up.
I draw mostly, but lately I've just wanted to make friends in the fandoms I'm in and have someone to talk about things with. I don't know any other fujos, so I can't talk about it with my friends (they find it weird and problematic). I could join social media to try and make friends but I always end up chickening out cause of my paranoia. You're probably right that just using anon sites is the best option. I get nervous about what I post even here but I need to get over that. AO3 is also a good suggestion I think. I don't write much but I've seen some people use it for fan art too.
No.5226
>>5224>can't talk about it with my friends (they find it weird and problematic)Dying to know what redeeming qualities they have to make up for "hand-wringing about gay cartoon porn". I do relate to the paranoia though and all of my friends know I'm a fujo. Fanart/fic is direct access to your lizard brain and it's kind of weird to have people who know you IRL poking around in there.
No.5227
>>5224can't relate sis, when it comes to my good friends they all know i'm a fujo, i literally send my straight male irl friend akechi/akira and kawoshin fanart as well as some cgs from slow damage he usually just says "lol female birth control" and "you sad little woman with your chinese fag obsession" but i feel the same way about his forumla one or whatever
No.5228
>>5215Is being a fujo really that shameful? How old are you nonna? If you aren't hurting anyone, why tf does it even matter? Do you really think men self-flagellate like this? Your only crime is being cringe. Look in Dreamwidth, AO3, LiveJournal, and Neocities.
No.6729
Any advice for dealing with antis and super woke people online? I'm not going to back down or involve myself in arguments. I just want to watch Hetalia in peace while not getting doxxed or have my other hobbies affected by busybodies.
>>833What's the best way to subtly gatekeep?
No.6730
>>6729You can't ever break anonymity. Get a different pseud for different fandoms, especially ones with high anti activity. I've got one for BnHA, another for JJK etc. Block early, block often and only follow people you know are "proship"/multishippers (unless you're a monoshipper, in which case, find the chill shippers of your individual ships).
Gatekeeping - If you sound like "I block freely and use chainblock. Do not interact with me unless you're over 18 or the age of majority in your country". Even if you're not a lawyer, tack that on to your persona. The antis are unsurprisingly docile when it comes to actual consequences for their shitty behavior.
I hate how a nerd hobby like anime, Hetalia even, has been taken over the worst normies on the planet.
No.6733
>>6729Depends on what caused it and where. I never blocked anybody but are left in peace, despite having 1000+ followers. When there is a call-out it doesn't involves me, maybe I just don't talk enough with others. I also heard that some of the fans I know considered me shady, probably because I don't use cutesy language and don't draw fluffy pastel art. This is a potential danger but I refuse to change.
Maybe it's discords too. The victims of call-outs I knew always had friends that were also friends of the attackers, so I suspect that 99% of fandom drama is disguised personal shit and envy. I would generally recommend to not engage. Better discuss series on 4chan or FC. I got banned from a discord once because people assumed I was lying about my gender after I posted a casual photo showing weapons and animal skulls in my room and they knew that I don't eat pastries and vegetables which means I must be a guy since women live off of grass and are afraid of swords or something.
Discords are incredibly retarded and always hiveminds that bully everybody away who doesn't fit in. So my serious advice is to avoid discord like the plague or to not talk too much. Especially never get involved in arguments, most discord users are emotionally unstable underaged that pretend you traumatized them if you disagree so other drones join them to take revenge.
Also what the other nonna said. Having different accs and names is a safety measure. You can switch accounts on Bluesky with just two clicks, no log-out necessary.
No.6901
>>6900I don't personally use the site to post art but based on what I collect for my folders it doesn't seem like there is any issue mixing fandoms plenty of artists post multi-copyright logs. I'd just make sure you're using the tagging system accurately.
No.6976
>>6975I was watching in order and found it uninteresting, but I think I'll have fun just skipping around
No.6979
>>6976I'll fight you IRL nonna, the Gintama anime is made to be experienced in order. There are so many jokes and callbacks you'll miss out on and the serious arcs hit much harder when you've been watching 40 episodes of SOL shitposting. It's best enjoyed when you slowly get to know the characters.
No.6981
>>6979>I'll fight you IRL nonnaNoooooo! ..・ヾ(。＞＜)シ
>It's best enjoyed when you slowly get to know the characters.Ah, I presume this was the issue. OK, one ep a day might be good.
No.6985
>>6984>seiyuu giving their bestI'll forever associate all Gintama seiyuu with their characters, it's impossible to hear Akira Ishida and not think of Zura or Sugita and Gintoki or Nakai Kazuya and Hijikata or Suzumura Kenichi and Okita. Although those particular VAs almost always sound the same in every role so they're easy to pick out.
No.7004
Is there any way to still order from Toranoana after they have banned Visa/Mastercard or am I fucked?
I ordered most of my doujinshi from there. They are usually not on any of the other sides I know unless it's sold second-hand on mandarake. FML why is everything always getting worse. What are you doing right now if you want new doujinshi, are there any good alternatives I don't know of?
No.7021
>>7020I don't think American Express is even issued outside of the US.
No.7022
>>7021I'm born and live in Scandinavia and have one. You're right though that I didn't research where it's even issued.
No.7023
>>7015>>7020>either getting into crypto or changing cardWell fuck. But thanks for telling me that Amexpress is accepted. I might chance it.
Still annoying as shit since it's connected with work and I just got Mastercard a year ago. Fuck western companies for being so fucking anal about 18+ shit. I am already seething that paypal blocks this.
Now let's pray that Amex will stay chill and not follow suit.
>>7016Mandarake is great but they sell second hand, so newer doujinshi might take years before they are getting resold and appear there, sadly.
No.7036
>>7022>>7023If possible, try to get a JCB card:
https://www.global.jcb/en/products/cards/issuerMany shops got cancelled by AmericanExpress (DLsite no longer offers it) and it's only going to get worse.
American Express is issued in other countries as well, but the conditions and fees vary (and in many countries you can only get it via the corporate route):
https://www.americanexpress.com/en-us/change-country/ No.7038
>>7004If youre really willing to get doujinshi on your hand without having to find it second hand you could try using a proxy to get around it?
Dont use buyee, their consolidation is shit and you have to go on discord to even have your request acknowledged, Neokyo seems to be the better proxy in the market
No.7041
>>7038What about Big in Japan? I only used them as a forwarding service, to buy from Surugaya.
Are there any proxies that help you with buying digital-only products? In the past it was something unheard of.
The absolute state of the current world.I'm not that anon who first asked about Tora, btw.
No.7042
>>7041atyrt unfortunately Im not well versed in buying digital only products, though iirc digital products cannot be bought in nekoyo. I dont think digital books can be purchased from proxy services for the time being as they rely on a physical product for insurance and having to deal with file links could be finnicky especially to an overseas client.
I did try searching up Big in Japan and only a wikipedia article talking about the phrase showed up, could you possibly link it to me?
No.7043
>>7042Whoa, I thought most people were familiar with Big in Japan?
http://biginjap.com
>nekoyoI've never heard of that company. I guess they might be useless for some BL doujin kek
>Prohibited Items>Obscene items (child pornography or any other material that violates the laws of Japan or your country regarding pornography)>or your country https://neokyo.com/en/forbidden-items
>as they rely on a physical product for insuranceDoesn't make sense, but I guess these are the specificities of the Japanese law.
No.7044
>>7043Ive only bought figurines and mascot merchandise from nekoyo so I cant vouch if they have the same grey area as buyee when it comes to R18 products, but I have bought R18 doujin via buyee and was able to get it through without any complications despite the 'Obscene item' rule also applying on their ToS.
Though I wouldnt recommend buyee for doujin purchases regardless since I had to pay extra storage time for the shitty consolidation wrangling.
>Obscene items (child pornography or any other material that violates the laws of Japan or your country regarding pornography)It may depend on what country youre in as it could include 2D depictions of underage characters as child pornography but the unfortunate reason as to why the rule is there is because child gravure/junior idol CDs are still being circulated secondhand on japanese sites and can be found easily on the open web :(
No.7047
>>7038The forwarders aren't the problem (though I agree that Buyee is shit, I mostly use Blackship), the issue is that I cannot use them on toranoana anymore and toranoana has most of the new doujinshi. Thing is you have to pay there first before they send it to the proxy/forwarder/your JP address but you can't do that anymore since they've banned most methods of payment westerners are using, especially with Amex getting cancelled as well now, based on what
>>7036 and others said.
What makes things worse is that the only other big provider for new doujinshi was Melonbooks which is blocking all European IPs and going 404 for me. I lack money so I am not that eager to get a VPN right now so I look up if there are any alternatives.
I will try to get into bitcash in order to keep using toranoana for now
>>7026 as nonna said, since it seems to be the last resort. Thanks to nonna for posting that!
All that aside the whole deal annoys me. It's so frustrating how everything is getting worse. We really lived in fucking heaven during the late 00s and early 10s when the internet was already fast enough and forwarders/proxies and piracy wide-spread but the internet not mainstream enough to attract the fucking cops and corps that set their minds onto destroying it.
Now we live in 2024 and soon it will be as hard to order Japanese goods and google a thing as back in 1995.
No.7059
How do you voice something that isn't your cup of tea without seeming like some kind of -phobic? I don't like a whole like of yuri or series centered around women with yuri tones. I can stomach it if the person behind it was a actual lesbian or bi woman, but sometimes it's not the case. The possibility is why I steer clear of most Gl manga and anime. I know some nonnas on here are lesbians and wouldn't care if the average straight person doesn't read this sort of thing but in the wider web, it feels like yuri is slowly but surely being perceived as more progressive just by having women in it.
No.7060
>>7059If the people around you aren't paranoid online cops you can voice it normally. I also rarely like yuri. It's the same as het romance for me, it can be great, but the majority of series are written by otaku for otaku so they are mind-numbingly boring and I hate those sugary super girly yuri that are so common these days.
> it feels like yuri is slowly but surely being perceived as more progressive just by having women in it.I feel like this is just the virtue signalling coming from otaku seeking ways to paint themselves as the people with the superior taste when they're actually just watching yuri to coom or because they're tranny or the moral brigades that scream WOMEN!! at every occasion.
I love a good bunch of yuri or yuri adjacent series, namely Revue Starlight, Madoka, even old problematic ones like Yami to Bōshi and I think yuri has a higher chance of being good than het since it's not written as self-insert shit but I swear almost every single person I see screaming about yuri these days is a tranny, either TIF or TIM.
No.7063
>>7059Even some hetshippers are starting to imply they're more progressive/feminist than fujos because their ships have a woman in it. Zero thoughts beyond woman existing = woke like chuds kek.
No.7064
>>7059Once you realize that a LOT of people driving the "yuri is more progressive because women" rhetoric are MTFs a.k.a. males and their 15-year old handmaidens, it starts making way, way more sense. People always point the fingers at lesbians for it but I can swear on my life that I've met far more adult female lesbian fujoshis than adult female lesbian yuri fans.
No.7065
>>7064Yeah most aggressive yuri threads reek of tranny mentality because the posters obsess over their hatred of everything they deem masculine which a lesbian or normal guy would never do. They lose their shit over male characters existing or anybody mentioning them (even outside of any shipping context) and they praise femininity and the victory of yuri as the only pure love in the world.
It's so obviously made by trannies. Even a woman that hated men wouldn't bring them up in a discussion about a girl anime. This only happens to people that can't forget about men because they are men. Some yuri fags will even pretend that juvenile male characters were women if they happen to like one since everything they like has to be "lesbian". They often even use user names with "lesbian" I noticed. Don't think I have ever seen a single lesbian calling herself "colorful lesbian" or "lesbian [name of male character]", those are always trannies.
And yeah even Asian fujos are often lesbians. Actual lesbians I mean.
No.7067
>>7063You see this crap on nu/a/ all the time these days. Shizos who are obviously just degenerated coomers with a waifu attacking everybody else under the pretense of progressiveness or feminism for saying anything bad about their waifu, shipping her with someone that isn't them (aka the MC they self-insert into) or making a harmless joke about her and this gets twice at worse if it's a yuri thread.
People talk about the 15 minute cooldown and other stuff but none of this bothers me, the one thing that largely killed /a/ for me were the aggressive shipping cop shizos that joined around 2018 and later.
No.7074
>>7059For me personally, I decided I'm just going to be honest about how I don't find yuri interesting and if it bothers people then it's their problem. And if someone were to get real shitty about it then I know who to block.
No.7075
To anyone who can give me advice.
I have been stuck in a relationship for years. There's nothing wrong with the guy, he's not abusive or plainly crazy. He's normal, but he is painfully childish, I feel like his nanny. He whines a lot, and I haven't romantically loved him for years now. I love him like a son, or a brother. I know that's weird. I try to leave but either he can't take it or I can't take it. I don't want to be his partner, but there's this part of me that just breaks down because I've known him forever. I am scared of being on my own even though nearly all of me is screaming for it. If I really put my foot down, I know he'd let me go, but then I just get choked up. I just want to be friends so bad, but then I know he will never be my friend, he would always be my ex.
People used to and still often do marry without loving each other so sometimes I tell myself I can do it. But then I feel so sick. It's impossible to talk to anybody about it, everyone figures it's easy and I'm just being ridiculous. I wish I could erase the relationship completely or go back to when we first met and just stay his buddy. Actually there probably isn't advice for this kind of thing. But maybe someone's gone through similar and made it out…
No.7076
>>7075Nonny, you know damn well you should leave him. Even if you don't care for yourself, does your boyfriend really want to be in a loveless resentful marriage?
I was in a similar situation to you anon, Ik it's very hard, you've built up so much and invested so much on this one guy, losing him is losing it all, but trust me, it's better to let go.
You should accept you're dependent and enmeshed to him and find a way to socialize with him the least possible and talk/spend time with someone else, when you feel you need to talk to him, go do something else. It helps you detach, if he feels you're letting go, he'll become "better", don't fall for that shit, it's temporary and deep down you know it.
No.7077
>>7075I'd say many, many women have been in your shoes. It's not ridiculous
>i'm scared of being on my own?Why? Unless you heavily rely on him financially, there's nothing to be afraid of. We're made to prioritize others and think of relationships as central to our life, but objectively, you'll be fine. It's like ripping off a band-aid, if your couple (as mediocre as it is) was central to you for many years, it looks painful when it's nothing in reality. You'll probably feel way better without a manchild around kek
>He whines a lotWhether you choose to stay for a bit or not, you need to tell him he's annoying and immature.
>either he can't take it or I can't take itNah he'll be fine. Really. I can guarantee you he simply enjoys having a doting girlfriend around. You're projecting your inner turmoil on him, from the way you describe him he looks like the (super common) type of man who sees a woman as a nice, serviceable plus in his life. He might be mad or confused but that's on him for not trying to make you happier.
No.7078
>>7076you're right I know. It's just very hard. It would've been easier if he saw that I was unhappy and just left me himself, as a kindness. But he seems to think we just have to work harder to fix things. It's not fair to him that I stay and continue to try even knowing I no longer want to, but I always end up feeling like a shitty person for not feeling the "right" way.
How did you leave your bf?
>>7077>You're projecting your inner turmoil on himThe last time I tried to leave, he cried and begged me not to. I don't know, it's very difficult when someone is like that. It feels like I'd be killing him. You're right that it's like ripping off a bandaid, but it hurts anyway. I know I have to leave. I just wish it wasn't so hard.
No.7079
>>7078>How did you leave your bf?My friends kinda bullied him into leaving me, I just didn't go back this time like I did the others despite his pleading. I realize I'm very lucky in having my friends intervene, despite on how betrayed I felt at the time.
>I know I have to leave. I just wish it wasn't so hardIt will always be hard, but detaching yourself from him and focusing on your hobbies and other people will make it a lot easier anon. You can do it.
No.7080
>>7075First of all, it's only going to hurt for a short while and you'll get over him. And soon enough, you'll wonder what you ever saw in him and once the realization of freedom sets in, you'll feel more liberated than you ever did and you can focus on finding your own identity once again. People marrying into loveless relationships never ends well and they will regret it so definitely don't do that. It's scary to be alone after a long relationship but reach out to your friends for support or find something to occupy your mind with, a new hobby or a video game or manga for example. He's going to beg you to come back, but it's just going to repeat itself. He himself doesn't know how to be alone either, and he also needs to learn.
No.7081
>>7078He's appealing to your sense of pity, but pity isn't desire or joy or affection. You can't stay with someone who's content with being in a pity relationship, you're better than that nona.
No.7087
>>7075please ditch the manchild anon, as someone who has been through the same thing it was so cathartic and freeing when i stopped prioritising his feelings over mine, i've never looked back and once you get over the initial feelings of pity so will you
No.7151
>>7047>What makes things worse is that the only other big provider for new doujinshi was Melonbooks which is blocking all European IPs and going 404 for me.It's not blocked for me or any European VPN nodes I use.
>I lack money so I am not that eager to get a VPN right now so I look up if there are any alternatives. Imagine paying for a VPN. Just install Proton - it's free and there are no data limits. If slow speeds don't bother you, you can also use
>https://www.vpngate.net No.7154
>>7047> I cannot use them on toranoana anymoreI think most forwarders have no issue with Tora and doujin material in general? Big in Japan doesn't and neither any of the the following:
>https://www.jauce.com/japan_auction_detail#restrictions>https://www.kuboten.com/help#terms_basic_prohibited>https://www.celga.com/index.php?page=genfaq>https://japamart.com/japan_forwarding_service.php#nohandle
>Thing is you have to pay there first before they send it to the proxy/forwarder/your JP addressThat's what proxies are for - they pay for you.
>Would you like to buy from a Japanese shop that doesn't ship internationally? Does the shop not accept foreign credit cards?>Our proxy service will help you place orders in those stores and will take care of the whole payment and shipping process.>https://www.biginjap.com/en/content/14-proxy
>All that aside the whole deal annoys me. It's so frustrating how everything is getting worse. We really lived in fucking heaven during the late 00s and early 10s when the internet was already fast enough and forwarders/proxies and piracy wide-spread but the internet not mainstream enough to attract the fucking cops and corps that set their minds onto destroying it.
We are becoming a dystopia. The plebs had enjoyed too much freedom.
No.7197
>>7079>>7080>>7081>>7087He broke up with me because he doesnt think I'm being a good girlfriend. I feel a little dead inside but also kind of relieved. I even told him to look after himself and he ignored me. I guess that's kind of how it always was.
Just a quiet update. Thanks for the advice.
No.7648
>>5224>>52131. Always make accounts/post through a VPN. There are plenty of free ones out there.
2. Never re-use the same email address for registration. Each site=new email. Same for the password. You can make email accounts without hassle of adding your phone number with Proton or
https://fedora.email .
3. Never re-use usernames/avatars/banners in forums.
4. Don't have a distinct posting style. Blend in.
5. Make a new account for each fandom.
6. De-google.
7. Check if your data is compromised on
https://haveibeenpwned.com8. Check how fingerprint-proof your browser is with
https://coveryourtracks.eff.org No.7678
Fellow suburbanites, what are you doing for fun and to meet people?
The people close to me are telling me not to go into the city on my own because it's dangerous, but they won't go with me and I have no one else to go with casually.
I don't have much to do here. I take the bus around and go shopping, go thrifting, go to the library, but I don't have anywhere to go where socializing makes sense. I have 0 pretense to speak to the people around me, no matter how much I stay off my phone and be present.
I've been told to make friends with no satisfying answer how, so I can finally stop being so dependent on so few people.
I've been told by my older relatives that as you get older, you just can't make friends anymore due to circumstance, but if that's the truth, what is the point in continuing with my life, as I already have so few irl friends. Did I ruin my adult life without repair by having a poor teenage life?
I work but I've never managed to sustain a friendship out of any of my past 3 jobs. I had one that got close, we hung out outside of work a few times, but she figured I liked her romantically and just stopped replying to me…
I just don't know what to do with myself.
No.7679
>>7678You say you go to the library and thrift shopping have you considered joining a book club or volunteering at the thrift shop? I'd personally suggest seeing if you can find a weekly event and go consistently to basically "force friend" other members who are also regulars.
No.7680
>>7678Seconding joining a book club like
>>7679 suggested. But I'm also in a similar situation irl where I have nobody who shares my non-normie (ie fujo) interests. I wish it was easier to make people spontaneously.
No.7681
>>7678I'll be real I lived in the suburbs until I was 30 and with my interests my only recourse was to make friends inside my computer (who then became IRL friends in their own time). Unless you genuinely enjoy normie-passing hobbies (TV, sports, community interests) I don't think you should force yourself. A book club our volunteering at the places you already like to be is a happy compromise.
>Did I ruin my adult life without repair by having a poor teenage life?No. Most adults do not have close friends IRL. I honestly think my early adoption to online socialization is what spared me from our current loneliness epidemic (which is not exclusive to men).
No.7682
>>7678I live in a weird, drug-ridden huge city and there is no issue going out alone at night. People who never tried it have a massively exaggerated city paranoia, especially (ironically) the younger suburban generations. I see a good bunch of grandmas walking around at night here, usually fans of operas and good restaurants or festivals that are slowly going home.
The downside? The danger isn't the only myth about most big cities. The other one is that socializing isn't easier at all IMO. I know more townies that made new friendships going to their local festivities than fellow citizen making friends in their own metropole. Cities are incredibly anonymous and you usually don't even know your neighbours on the same floor (and they change all the time anyway).
Maybe it's different for others but personally, I can only find new friends if there is a common interest. So all of my current friends are either from university (I studied archaeology, which is a genuine interest of mine) and the internet. The internet is unironically the best place to meet likeminded people. I don't use instagram and the likes but it's probably not much different there.
>>7681>I honestly think my early adoption to online socialization is what spared me from our current loneliness epidemic (which is not exclusive to men).This. I sadly rarely see my friends since most of them live farer away, but the fact that I have any at all it because of forums and other places for special interests (mainly anime).
I lost all of my former friends when I finished school and I think it's almost impossible keeping them through the 20s and 30s because the moment some of them marries they are usually lost to you. At least in my experience. It doesn't help that I am the type of ass that doesn't care about love and kids at all, so they cannot talk to me about that and so the friendships and the only ones left are eternal volcels and autists like me lol
No.7690
>>7678Seconding the anon that says the city isn't as dangerous you might think. It may depend on what city you're talking about, or country you live in, but I grew up in the suburbs, moved to the city, and now live on a farm, so I've been all over. No real difference in my day-to-day life re: crime/safety.
That being said–if you're an adult with a job, are you able to spend money and travel a little? I've been able to meet up with fujo fandom friends irl as an adult, which has honestly been life-changing for my social life. Also, if you like anime, video games, or j-fashion, conventions or meet-ups are an easy way to socialize and meet people.
No.7691
>>7679>>7680Thank you for the suggestions. I think volunteering at a thrift store would interest me most. The one I go to actually doesn't do that, only employment, but I think a church near me has one so I should ask them if they need help.
>I'm also in a similar situation irl where I have nobody who shares my non-normie (ie fujo) interestsAh! I had one for a little at an old job, but we never connected all that closely before we both left that job
>>7681>Unless you genuinely enjoy normie-passing hobbies (TV, sports, community interests) I don't think you should force yourselfIt's nice to hear this from someone similar, thank you ♥
>>7682Yeah I also think it's kinda of over blown as well. I think there are some really shitty parts in mine, but plenty of it perfectly fine parts as well.
>The other one is that socializing isn't easier at all IMOYes, I think I've over stated the ease of socializing in my own head, I'll try and be more realistic with myself, considering it's not only my environment, but slight autism/bad socializing skills in general that make things hard for me. Regardless, I think it'd still be nice to enjoy a new environment for its own sake
>I can only find new friends if there is a common interestSame. When there's an open one, I'd like to join a figure drawing class. Idk if that's the best place because it's a pretty focused activity, but maybe after class I can chat? Drawing is my main hobby and I think I have alot to talk about in that regard, I'm very opinionated lol
>the city isn't as dangerous you might thinkI have to be real, the idea of going out alone, especially during the day time never bothered me much, and my family does not seem overly worried, but I was talking with my ex right before I made that post and he was really agitated and really dismissive, a thought that taking the bus out there was some horrible idea, and that I was stupid, and didn't elaborate, then hung up on me so I got it in my head that it was impossible, and was really un-reasonably upset about my situation because of that bad conversation. But now I feel much better.
>are you able to spend money and travel a little My online friends at least, are really scattered and far, so I don't think that's likely, but for travelling to conventions and meet-ups, I should try. I got into lolita recently, so I would like to attended a meet-up sometime this winter, thank you!
You're all really kind and reasonable to me, so thank you to all of your advice to everyone that replied
No.7696
I've decided that I'm at the point in my life where I need to step out of my comfort zone in my very rural, small town with my family all living within driving distance
I've also decided that I would like to live in Washington, but nothing is concrete at the point, so it's a tossup between Spokane and Seattle, but maybe a smaller town near one of those places would be better?
Spokane wouldn't be as big of a jump from my town of about 5k people, and it's not as expensive to live there, but since I would like to get a studio apartment and since Spokane has lower wages, does the price matter? I'm sure the traffic would be easier to adapt to, and I won't be quite as overwhelmed, but I'm unsure if it has as many opportunities as I'm hoping for at this point in my life
On the other hand, Seattle is MUCH bigger, even further from my family, and might be too much for me to handle as a country bumpkin… but at the same time, the idea of pushing myself to adapt to such a different environment sounds exciting, and there would be so much to do everyday! A wider dating pool sounds good on paper, I could see the ocean for the first time, there's networking opportunities, more conventions, etc.
I could always live somewhere smaller and just drive to the city when I feel like it to maintain my sense of ruralness, but the idea of placing myself right in the middle of a bustling city sounds so exciting! Do I just need a reality check? Is choosing where to live even this big of a deal for people that aren't from tiny towns?
I have the logistics down of living anywhere, but I feel like I'm still grappling with my emotions and sensibilities
Sorry for the word dump lol
No.7705
>>7696I am in Seattle regularly but live in Portland: the Seattle/PNW freeze is real and has been exacerbated by covid. As for living in a city itself: I've tasted the forbidden fruit of being able to walk or take a train everywhere I care about and that's going to be really hard to give up as I enter the "I want to buy a home" phase of my life. Sometimes I think it is better to not have known!
>reality checkSeattle is the first place I saw somebody doing heroin in their car at a stoplight and its unhoused population is so much more bold than Portland's. Living in a city with a drug problem can erode your compassion. My balcony opens to a beautiful view of an on/off ramp and I regularly hear panhandlers get into screaming matches with each other. A guy overdosed right under the balcony so I carry narcan now. Sometimes you will be walking along and see somebody who has their brain cracked by P2P meth shambling toward you and have to decide if you want to roll the dice and walk by them or reroute and look like a bitch (I also carry mace now). Back when I lived on the ground floor it was a coin toss on whether or not I'd get packages stolen so I eventually sucked it up and got a PO box. I can't wear my preferred bag because it's too big and I get treated like a criminal in local stores just for having it. Just a lot of little things that add up and turn you into more anxious/irritable person. Also the public toilet situation is terrible because even shit like McDonald's has a door code.
A lot of what I'd consider the big positives of city living have been lost to covid. Unless it's explicitly a night club, bar, or 24-hour establishment (some gyms and groceries), most things close by 8 or 9. There is little room for evening/AM spontaneity unless you are downtown.
>Is choosing where to live even this big of a dealWhen looking at places to live, I'd google street view them and compare what they have now to what they did pre-covid. All these businesses that didn't survive covid on my stretch of road invite petty crime and campers and nobody is interested in trying to re-open them in the years they have been vacant.
As for living somewhere and driving into the city, Vancouver, WA gets to enjoy being just across the river from Portland with a fraction of the crime and cheaper rent. People also choose to live/work there because there is no income tax in WA, then hop over to Portland to shop because there is no sales tax in OR (there is an IKEA, mall, and Costco right next to the eastern bridge on the OR side, which makes this setup so easy that I'm jealous).
No.7707
>>7706I'm sorry girl I have this shitlib autocorrect embedded into my hands. (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞
No.7712
>>7705This is so helpful! I didn't consider that COVID would've still had such an impact in cities, and I feel a little silly for not thinking to check the street views…
Thank you for the Vancouver recommendation, though! I hadn't considered living near Portland, but a handful of family friends have moved there over the years, so that will definitely be a contender
I should be doing my due diligence on crime rates and safety of where I get a place, my area has historically had a major heroin/meth problem but usually addicts holed up in meth houses to avoid trouble, idk how well I'd handle any direct confrontation
Thank you again!
No.7713
I need help from fellow fujos who sail the seas, where do you usually download bl cds from?
No.7716
>>7713Aarin still the best after all these years. There is also blcd.online which has a much smaller collection but let's you stream.